By: Jana Greene
“Hey, God…..”
“Yes?”
“What’s going to happen further along down the road?”
“I’m sorry, that’s on a need-to-know basis. Just trust me.”
“But….”
“Trust me, love. Whatever comes further, I’m already there with you.”
I’m always badgering God about what’s next, even though I know that I couldn’t even handle it if I knew. Seriously, I COULD NOT EVEN. But in some convoluted way, I ask God to reveal to me the outcome of certain things, but the gift of prophesy is not my strong suit.
I am considering this today as I’m struggling with my health issues. I have a rare-ish condition that causes chronic fatigue, migraines, intermittent system pain, and recurrent infections. It’s not going to kill me, but some days I feel like it would kill me if it were more merciful.
Here’s the thing, though: If God had revealed to me that I would do battle with this for the rest of my life, I don’t know that I would have stayed sober. I don’t know if I’d handle it well at all, so I’m grateful for the not knowing.
While I was busy NOT knowing, He went further down the road with me when I wasn’t even looking. The manifestations of His mighty hand over this struggle were being constructed long before I was even symptomatic.
If God had revealed that I would carry this thorn, maybe it would have gone down like this:
“Child, enough badgering! Come sit with me, and I will indulge your curiosity….
“As you grow older, you will feel like your mind and body are falling apart, because they will be – sort of – and you will be scared and tired and frustrated. But I’m working on an infrastructure for your life so that you will be able to carry this yoke…..
“I will bring you a spouse who adores you, and believes you when you are telling the truth about your pain. He will never give up on you, even when you are really sick….
“I will drop friends into your life with EXACTLY this same disease that you suffer from, and they will seemingly drop from the clear blue sky. You will marvel that I took such care to place those perfect people in your life at just the right moments. Lean on them and let them lean into you. They are sent directly from me….
“When you are having a bad day and hurting inside and out, I will scootch right up next to you so close that you can feel my love for you, even through the pain. My Holy Spirit will be IN you, giving you fresh hope, even through the tears…..
“I will give you the gift to write about your experience, so that you can pay this Love forward to others….the ones who are gravely sick but look well, the ones whose labs and tests all come back normal and they feel like they are losing their minds, and that nobody believes them. YOU will comfort and believe them, just as you have been comforted….
“I will give you humor in copious quantities, so that you can not just survive, but THRIVE….
“Whatever comes further, I am already there with you.”
I get by with a LOT of help from my friends.
God bless us, every one.
Musings of a Gypsy Soul 
Sorry Jana about your not feeling well. I remember way back when, some doctor told me
you are just going to have to live with this! You have Epstein Barre, it is not treatable.
I fought back & saw another doctor who ran a whole battery of tests. My hormones were
whacky. I had had all my baby producing removed early. Hormones did the trick, and I was
right as can be for years.
Hope somebody can find a reason for your health problems. Suffering is not an option
if there is a remedy.
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Thanks so much. I’m so glad you got resolution!!! Hugs to you, my sweet friend.
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I’m so happy JoAnna re-blogged your post so that I could stop by and see you 😉 Yes…the diseases that don’t affect how you look and people constantly say, “oh, but you LOOK fine…” Been there…done that…don’t care to repeat!
(And as I look at the comment I realize I tend to use “…” quite a lot also 😉
Hope you are managing your disease (instead of letting it manage you.” Blessitude
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Thank you so very much ❤ And God bless YOU too!
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Reblogged this on Special Creation Woman and commented:
For those feeling in stuck in a health situation totally beyond your control, maybe these wonderful words will comfort you. And if you will pray for the lovely woman who wrote them, God will probably bless you even more. : )
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Dear Jana,
I am so sorry you are having to go through this.
It sounds like you are redeeming your pain: i.e., using it for the glory of God and the comfort of those around you. I have reblogged it just now.
I don’t know if this will help you, but I am praying it will: I just bought “Dr. KellyAnn’s Bone Broth Diet” book that tells you how to heal your body on the cellular level. I was mildly interested in it a few days ago. Then I twisted my back something painful, of all things, by playing the piano. I didn’t know that was even possible. Now I can barely stand up straight, and walking is painful. It does seem that our pains draw us together more than our triumphs, doesn’t it?
You will be in my prayers, and in my thankful prayers. Everything you write is just so encouraging to me. Thank you!
Best Regards,
“Gwennon”
I Peter 5:7
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What a wonderful, wonderful comment. Thanks so much, I needed that! Also, prayers are always welcome 🙂 And yep, that’s the crazy thing about pain, it does indeed draw us together. If even Jesus suffered it, we are surely not immune. Thanks for letting me know your thoughts – I really love hearing from readers! Prayers coming your way, too!
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