By: Jana Greene
“The career of motherhood and homemaking is beyond value and needs no justification. Its importance is incalculable.”
― Katherine Short
My kitchen sink is clean, and I’m proud of that. I have dinner in the crock-pot, and I’m proud of that, too. And my kids, who are now sixteen and nineteen, sit down with me and talk to me about drama that is their lives. And I’m grateful . I am not an active member of the Outside World Workforce (can I call it the “OWW”?) right now. I am a homemaker and a writer, just for this season in my life.
I worked from home when my daughters were small so that I could watch them grow up, and then…just when they hit the adolescent years, I entered the OWW. Well, I was still Mom, of course. I fed them, and clothed them, and loved them tremendously. But I had other things to do, like work to put food on the table.
In 2004, going through a divorce sort of forced me into the OWW. At first, I worked four part-time jobs with flexible hours to support my girls. Eventually, it became simpler to work one full-time position to keep a roof over our heads. My babies weren’t really babies anymore, although they needed me just as much at nine and twelve as they ever did in infancy. With their parents divorcing and three moves in as many years, they probably needed me more.
It is at this point that they became “latch-key kids”. Once again, I became one of the mothers whose heads I had previously heaped the hot coals of judgment upon. When life was easier, I had the luxury to judge. Now, I was one of those mothers myself.
I am learning – slowly – that coals are for fueling compassion, not for heaping in judgment. But I can be a slow learner.
Those mothers, they do what they have to do – and yes, sometimes what they want to do.
I am glad that women have a choice visa vie working in the home and/or out of the home. But I don’t believe she must work outside of the home to be successful. There is success in a clean home, and dinner on the table, and in being present for your family in the moment. I’m not sure when the value of those things diminished in society, but it’s sad that they have. Many women don’t get the opportunity to choose at all. I have been both, at times.
My recent stint as a homemaker? Caused by a series of unfortunate events, or so I’d believed when the first “domino” fell.
I am actually most fortunate. For however long it lasts, I will enjoy caring for my family in ways that – to be honest – I resented having to care when I came home at the end of a long work-day. Tired, fried, irritable and stressed-out.
A workday that was supposed to make me feel successful.
Looking forward to my husband returning from a day at work – and doing the little things to remind him that he is appreciated…..is a luxury that I am enjoying to the fullest. Making sure he has clean clothes and a hot meal at the end of the day? I find that fulfilling.
Yeah. I said it.
When my girls approach me after school or work to talk to me about what is going on/ not going on/ bothering them/ elating them/ the latest crush/the latest heartache….we talk about it. We laugh a lot more these days, because I am not too exhausted to engage. Again, to God be the glory that I can be present for them now, in this moment. Time is fleeting, and they are so close to departure from the nest.
Sooner or later (most likely sooner) I will again seek employment out “in the real world, and I will work hard at whatever job is next, and do my best to be successful. This season, too, shall pass.
But I don’t feel “un-successful” now. Not everyone smart and passionate finds fulfillment in the OWW.
Some women are better at “bringing home the bacon and frying it up in a pan”. I’m just not that good at “having it all”, I guess. But I sure do love all that I have.
It is fulfilling. And that’s the truth.
4 thoughts on “An “Inside Job””
Jana I love this! I am off work today and just came down from ironing to read your blog. Isn’t it so crazy that we are both taking time off from the OWW when society thinks we should be working more – we do have college to pay for right? I too am trusting God to lead me where I should be. June 1st is my last day at work. and I am sad, but I know there is a reason and my work environment was getting in the way of my relationship with Roger and God! I was judging and not loving my co-worker. I feel so much better now that I have handed all that over to the Lord! Keep on blogging girl – I love it – you are really helping me through this period of life!!
Thank you so much, Cris. I am not at all suprised that we are going through similar things right now, and I’m so glad that you will be taking a break from work and getting out of an unhealthy environment. Keep handing it over to Him! I have to remind myself to do it every day 🙂 I’m so grateful that you are reading this blog, too, and so glad it is helping. It’s a labor of love, for sure – I still have no idea what I will do “for a living” but this FEELS like what I’m supposed to do FOR LIVING…if that makes any sense whatsoever… Lol. I love you, friend!
Keep on blogging and writing!! I love watching the birth of what I know will grow into a book and even a ministry! It’s really true, all moms work. Moms struggle and juggle and try to make it all work, often feeling like they’re not measuring up against the “other group” of moms. The real “war on women” is any issue that seeks to divide us as moms. Moms unite!! Because women hold the real revelations to solving this world’s problems. (But I’ll refrain from saying who said that!) Love this!! SAVOR each day at home and let God direct the timing of re-entry. He may say, “Stay….just a little bit longer.” I hope He does.
Oh, me too, Liz! Thank you for your support – I love you, girl!